Jamie & Alyssa explore the world of period crafts and menstrual blood magic. Will we write the names of our enemies in blood? We shall see. Being a woman is cool! Also some personal stories you don't want to miss, including Jamie's Neverland Ranch! If you can't handle period things, cause you're a weird adult baby - skip to the middle.
Jamie & Alyssa explore the world of period crafts and menstrual blood magic. Will we write the names of our enemies in blood? We shall see. Being a woman is cool! Also some personal stories you don't want to miss, including Jamie's Neverland Ranch! If you can't handle period things, cause you're a weird adult baby - skip to the middle.
Write us some of your cringe stories at nervouslaughterpodcast@gmail.com
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Unknown Speaker 0:00
So I found out recently that Alicia Silverstone, the Clueless actress...well, actress that played in clueless not that she is clueless....she baby birds, her son. I think this was like a long time ago, but like God knows yeah and there's a video of it too. I haven't seen it. I've just seen kind of like, stills from it. Like, I just see the stills almost like nope, I can't watch it.
Unknown Speaker 0:55
So she didn't want to, like make baby foods. So she's like, I'm just gonna spit food
Unknown Speaker 1:02
I guess. I don't know. And it's weird because like in the video, it's soup. So I don't know. Like, what kind of stupid is that?
Unknown Speaker 1:12
That's just insulting. Like, I'm gonna swish this soup in my mouth and fucking give it to you and into your mouth.
Unknown Speaker 1:19
Yeah. Very. Yeah, very gross. But um, maybe I'll have to like, cover her more because a lot of people have a lot of issues with like her parenting style.
Unknown Speaker 1:34
Oh, yeah, she's into hippie weird shit, right? Yeah. Maybe once we hit a million downloads, one of us can baby bird into the other ones mouth.
No, no, no, no,
We'll never get to millions downloads though so I think its Okay?
Unknown Speaker 1:56
And, if if we do get a million, I'm just gonna come back and delete this
Unknown Speaker 2:05
At a million we'll probably be like famous. So I guess you can spit soup at my mouth? For the pod.
Unknown Speaker 2:12
Okay, you take it? For some reason. I was like, I guess I would have to be the one that does it. And I don't know if I'm willing to. I would feel really bad doing it, too.
Unknown Speaker 2:22
Yeah, maybe it's not a good idea. Let us know.
Unknown Speaker 2:29
I'll just go against it. Like if you're sharing a toothbrush. Yeah. You don't want to do this.
Unknown Speaker 2:37
That's a good point, though. If I had to choose between sharing a toothbrush, and having soup spit into my mouth, I would probably just do that. Because the toothbrush I feel like you're really getting in there. And there's a lot of bacteria particles...the soup. It's just kind of in your mouth for a second
Unknown Speaker 2:54
yeah, but like, there's bits in it now. And it's like starting the very beginning of the digestive. Sure. True. Okay. I just like I don't, I don't like food in people's mouth, either. I mean, that's where it belongs. But you know, I'm welcome to nervous laughter podcast. Welcome, everybody. If we get a million downloads we will not be doing that
Unknown Speaker 3:21
We're just two little baby birds.
Unknown Speaker 3:26
Alyssa has a baby bird story
Unknown Speaker 3:36
My friend Jonathan. We were hanging out at a party and I was pretty drunk. I don't know if he was but
Unknown Speaker 3:47
you don't have to tell it.
Unknown Speaker 3:51
I don't mind telling it. I was just trying to like I hadn't thought it through yet.
Unknown Speaker 3:56
I was trying to,
like sprung it on you.
Unknown Speaker 3:59
I was eating these chocolate covered almonds. And he was like, Oh, I love almonds. But I don't like the chocolate. So I don't know whose idea it was. But basically I ate the chocolate of the almond in gave it to him.
Unknown Speaker 4:15
And he was a willing participant.
Unknown Speaker 4:16
I was like, that's cool. If you want to eat my almonds. You definitely can. And he's gay. So it wasn't even like a weird sex thing. He just wanted the almonds
Unknown Speaker 4:30
Two friends sharing a chocolate. Yeah, or splitting I guess. Yeah, both. Both.
Unknown Speaker 4:39
It's pretty gross. Looking back. I'm like, Why did I do that? But I wasn't really on the gross on my part?
Unknown Speaker 4:46
Yeah, I mean, it happens, like sometimes. And speaking of gross women. I'm just gonna I'm just trying to find a good segway.
Unknown Speaker 4:57
It's a good segway.
Unknown Speaker 4:58
So uh, Alyssa had talked about a really interesting art piece that lady did. And it reminded me of this other. This craft Craftivist. woman, her name's Casey Jay Jenkins and she did a sorry, pulling up the article. Okay, and so, um, since 2013, she, she has been inserting yarns yarns of wool into her vagina while having her period. Oh, quote, it hasn't been every month but I have been inserting the wool to soak up the menstrual blood, which I have dried and unraveled and rewound and frozen think and said. It is akin to inserting a tampon. It's that's how it feels. So far, she has collected about 20 Small schemes schemes of stained wool. Yeah, and so like, she can't find how many days she did it before. But she would go to like the art installation and just like start so when it straight from her vagina like the whole piece, it was kind of almost just like a really, really long scarf, I guess you could say and it was kind of like draped over some things. So it would like you she would just continue just to add on to it every day. And she so I guess it was important that she kind of mentioned like the RE rebounding it because she would do it from like, the inside. So the so it would pull the spool from the inside, like, not the outside so she could like pull it out safely. I guess. That's so crazy. And that would feel really weird. Like,
Unknown Speaker 7:11
old and there's like a weird thing and you it was hard to get it out. I mean, that probably wouldn't happen. But I don't
Unknown Speaker 7:17
know. I guess you're just pulled the whole clump out.
Unknown Speaker 7:21
Oh, man. I just think about like, a little piece of wool breaking off and getting stuck in there. And then you get like some weird infection. I don't know.
Unknown Speaker 7:31
Well, I mean, like, Tammy, I guess she used like the same Material as tampons. Like, I guess it was cotton. But I mean, still. I mean, it's still like terrifying to get like, part of a tampon second you do, like
Unknown Speaker 7:48
barbecued people do like weird shit like that. I'm like, Cool. Like, I can see doing that. Not for me. That's cool. It's a choice. Like, I've heard that people use menstrual blood or water their plants and like the vitamins and minerals in it are like really good for your plants.
Unknown Speaker 8:10
Not me. I wouldn't doubt if people like turn it into a pill or something to take sounds like something people would do.
Unknown Speaker 8:23
I started following this girl online like, probably like 10 years ago, and she would like collect all of her blood like in a jar. She just had this like big jar of blood. And one of the things that she would do. Well, she did do in the past. I guess her partner consented to this, but she made cookies out of the menstrual blood. Mm hmm. That's like a whole thing. Like there's a lot of magic where you use menstrual blood and it's like it a bunch of like across different cultures. Like you can use it for all kinds of stuff. But there's a lot of spells for like love and lust and stuff and you just like use your period blood.
Unknown Speaker 9:09
Just just the flick of
Unknown Speaker 9:15
man minstrel glad Griggs. Yeah, have you ever seen midsummer? Yes. Yeah. There's the part where they're at the dinner and the the guy that ends up in the bear suit. He like has a glass that's kind of a different color. And this girl like looks over and it's like imply that she had put like her blood and drain.
Unknown Speaker 9:39
Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, but that was a pretty good movie. I think I just got I think you're overhyped by the time I saw it. Still good movie. But yeah,
Unknown Speaker 9:52
I saw it in the theater was Chris. Oh, it's fun. Hey, yeah. Hey, we're going to see a movie.
Unknown Speaker 9:58
Hey, I got crazy because
Unknown Speaker 10:05
they were yeah with the the blood magic I just kind of googled it real quick I didn't want to sound insensitive because that's like thing people like seriously do but apparently it's like across a bunch of different cultures but Teen Vogue decided to tap into it
Unknown Speaker 10:29
we tried to bring it to the US now
Unknown Speaker 10:32
I just searched Love Spell using period blood first article that pops up is from Teen Vogue says menstrual blood magic three spills for your period how to make your menstruation magical and like this does not seem like a very Teen Vogue article but
Unknown Speaker 10:50
okay yeah, you can
Unknown Speaker 10:54
use it to own your power protect from unwanted negativity in cleaning up your life when the cleaning up your life is collected, collects your menstrual blood and add a few drops to a small cup of water to use as ink to write a list of people or situations you wish to release from your life damn
Unknown Speaker 11:17
well actually sounds pretty
Unknown Speaker 11:20
fucking cool use your blood is ink
Unknown Speaker 11:28
I don't know wait so you write down for people that you want to banish from your
Unknown Speaker 11:32
life yet to release to people or situations that you want to release from your life for some reason my brains just like make a death list with a list I'm sure you
Unknown Speaker 11:46
could like Death Note but with your period blood
Unknown Speaker 11:49
there's a bunch of different uses uses it looks like sue the other ones
Unknown Speaker 11:54
use it for cleaning your sink I don't really know like break in but I saw a thing where people use catch up to like clean stuff I've seen it yeah
Unknown Speaker 12:06
because I guess I was like a little bit of sanity Yeah, like no fucking way
Unknown Speaker 12:12
that continue with the uses for period blood though please.
Unknown Speaker 12:16
So for protection, you can collect any pieces of broken glass tax nails, screws, anything else you've collected like that you just find on the ground you put it in a main mason jar with your menstrual blood or use tampon seal it tight and very near your home for protection I mean that sounds pretty easy.
Unknown Speaker 12:44
I mean why not? You know that much effort
Unknown Speaker 12:50
do you say you're picking up trash along the way you know that could pop somebody's tire yeah skip yeah appointment where he just say
Unknown Speaker 12:58
I just like can you imagine love fucking smell of that after it's been like, buried for years and someone's like, oh, what's open it and it's just like, oh,
Unknown Speaker 13:09
do there reminds me Have you seen that video or it's a diver. And he like finds this jar that's fucking sealed and red wax and he's like, I'm gonna open it and he opens it and like all this stuff comes out and I'm like, I'm not very like super stages stupid. Superstitious. But if I found a fucking jar sealed and yeah, I'm a little stitches but if I found the jar sealed in wax I'd be like nope there's evil in that job
Unknown Speaker 13:43
yeah, um he opened it under the water yeah. Which is weird to scarier to do like I don't
Unknown Speaker 13:53
know I'll have to find it and but he's already scuba diving which is already a bad decision. Yeah, no fucking way person does not make good decisions.
Unknown Speaker 14:03
Nope. man Yeah, I have so many like diving gone wrong stories. Maybe they can talk about some some time. They've happened to you know, not to me just like other people. They wind up like dying and stuff. Like it's always bad because like, they'll go like, into like a cave or whatever. And then like there's some cases that it's just like, things just didn't go well. And then some is just like people being really stupid like, people. There's like a guideline like rope that they're supposed to hang on to you and a guy just like left. And the person was like, Dude, you need to fucking hold on to this like serious like because you'll get disoriented and you'll get lost easily. I think he went away from the rope like three or four times and got lost and like in died?
Unknown Speaker 15:03
That is so terrifying. Yeah. I don't like small places, and I don't like the water. Don't really care for the dark either. So to just be like, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna combine all these three things and then not listen to the professional helping me do it.
Unknown Speaker 15:21
I yeah, I am sorry. I'm just like Latin loss for words because I'm just like, it's just so many dangerous things at once. It's like breaking my brain. Like I wouldn't be able to be an instructor
Unknown Speaker 15:34
like that. No, no, cuz I'm like, people are stupid. They're gonna like break their neck and then it's like, on you. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 15:43
we're gonna like take off their oxygen breathing device and be like it's fine. Yeah, lots of dumb stuff. And yeah, people going after like, like, yeah, you shouldn't go out there alone. And it's like, close after this time pretty much and then people are just like, Alright, I'll see you guys later. I hate it. Yes. Um, was there any other period? Tips for your period?
Unknown Speaker 16:13
Not really. I was looking for one where you like put it on your face or something? But I haven't found it yet.
Unknown Speaker 16:20
I feel like that would be one the like channel your inner woman? Yeah. Or something?
Unknown Speaker 16:26
Oh, yeah. He just makes like that woman symbol with blood.
Unknown Speaker 16:30
Or just like, you know, go up to your husband and just do a little symbol What the fuck did you do you love me? Fucking married you?
Unknown Speaker 16:49
Not anymore yeah, but I think that's all I have for the magic. Maybe I'll do kind of a deep dive on that and
Unknown Speaker 17:00
learn more about it. Yeah, I don't think I'm really into using like my period blood for our like repurposing my period blood like DIY. But if I ever have a kid I might do the like. What's it called? Like the afterbirth stuff?
Unknown Speaker 17:19
Like, oh, like eat the placenta? Yeah, but pill. I
Unknown Speaker 17:22
think I would do the pill. I don't think I want to like, I remember. Like, you get like ribs. I think I saw this thing on TLC when I was younger. That just made me like really like one of those things you wash and then just don't really talk for the rest of the day. It was like a lady had all of her friends over to like, eat her placenta to Yeah, they like cooked it in different ways. And I don't think I'm ever going to be less close to anybody. Okay, 2 million downloads. All you want to change. I would have to have a baby first. So that would be Oh, and it's Mother's Day. Coming out after Mother's Day.
Unknown Speaker 18:18
Oh, yeah, that's pretty fitting.
Unknown Speaker 18:22
Um, yeah, so I would probably do placenta pills. Um, but I do have a period story from like, when I was a kid. Like when I first started my period, and of course I started at school. Wow. Yeah. And then why not? Yeah. Then I so I was just like, oh shutter soft, like, like, go to the nurse's office. And so I did that. And I just tried to open the door. And like, the lights were off and she was like, trying to close the door and or, like, like, she was like, Oh, I'm not open right now or just something like that. I mean, looking back that seems really weird. Like, sitting in the dark and you're so maybe there was something weird going on. But it was like, I'm sorry, but I just started
Unknown Speaker 19:14
my period. She was like fuck
Unknown Speaker 19:16
for the first time. Yeah. And um, she just gave me like these really? Like I don't know heavy duty pads like the ones that don't have the wings but that gone yeah. So yeah, that was a great just start to my period starting at school with that and then I got home and I was like Mom, help. And she gave me a box of super plus tampons. Already the instructions. Oh,
Unknown Speaker 19:54
that's that hurts so bad. Yeah. I'm like I don't know. I'm already being really fucking gross today. I'm like, how much more? I don't want to go but like if
Unknown Speaker 20:05
you if anyone needs to cut off now it's your now's your chance. Yeah, like
Unknown Speaker 20:14
putting a super plus one, it's probably gonna be like dry and like scraping all the way. Like it they're bigger and like the well I am
Unknown Speaker 20:29
I'm trying to remember like how long I use that one for I'm not gonna like go in depth on it, but like I had to wind up having a have like pretty heavy flow. So after some time, I probably good.
Unknown Speaker 20:44
Yeah, but for your first
Unknown Speaker 20:47
like, oh, like I don't know, I probably would have just like, use pads or something. But I see like now like when I see some people do like period parties and stuff when they're starting. They'll just make like a cake and like, parents are so
Unknown Speaker 21:04
supportive now. It's crazy. Like, we were like that.
Unknown Speaker 21:11
Yeah, it's like, oh, that thing you went through. That really sucked. I went through that too. It's just and we'll never discuss it though. Yeah, we'll never discuss it or like, you're fine.
Unknown Speaker 21:23
College you feel entirely alone. I would have liked a cake. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 21:30
For like my, I think it might have been my 18th birthday. I don't remember. But my dad got me this. It was just this like chunk of fudge. And he like wrapped it in. I guess he printed it out and made his own wrapping paper. But it was just like a bunch of like jokes and comics about like periods. And I was like, All right. Thanks for my Tonka fudge period jokes. Best
Unknown Speaker 22:18
Yeah, I had an experience like that once that the nurses like hey, so I think this was in sixth grade. I felt kind of weird, but I was like, Nah, everything's fine. And then I sat down and it was like, squish. And I was like, I was wearing overalls. I don't know why I was wearing overalls. But as like this definitely went through. So I had to go to the nurse's office and you know, she gave me stuff but be Oh, sorry. Go ahead. I was just gonna say imagine being the school nurse and just like having to deal with it like awkward scenario probably like, multiple times a week some girls just like crying like
Unknown Speaker 23:10
one time. I think like janitors also helped a lot with that too. I know it sounds weird, but you know, like, a like that happened to someone I knew and like the janitor, kind of like you know, help them out
Unknown Speaker 23:21
down janitors or the fucking MCPS talked about that.
Unknown Speaker 23:27
They're just like the little mini moms of the school. Um, yeah, I am. I bled through a lot at school. It was so embarrassing like so like, I had to like jacket around my waist a lot and all that good stuff. But like, Have you ever like leak through and then like, you get up and it's like on the seat? Oh, calm. That was the worst. I hated it so much. And then you have to find a way to like, nonchalantly like, wipe you're
Unknown Speaker 24:00
like, Oh, I dropped this roll of paper towels on my chair. Go back and forth with them for a minute.
Unknown Speaker 24:07
I think I would like try to like use my jacket, like the inside of the sleeve or just like the outside. Just like I don't know what it tried. Because it was like, I didn't know what to do. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 24:17
that's a panic scenario. And like, I was thinking back on this the other day. I had a lot of teachers where you like couldn't go to the bathroom in class, or you only could like a certain amount of times. Like that's pretty fucked up. Like I look back on it.
Unknown Speaker 24:31
Fucking bleed through my tampon and my fucking pad because my flow is insanely heavy.
Unknown Speaker 24:38
Yeah, and like, just even like regular pee and poop stuff like kids. They're still kids. Like, I don't think sometimes they have the like, foresight enough to be like, oh, I need to go in between classes or like, you know, yeah,
Unknown Speaker 24:55
they talk go when they have to go,
Unknown Speaker 24:59
man, that's One of the good parts about working for carboy. Number three is like going to the bathroom whenever I want. Like, when I worked in the
Unknown Speaker 25:08
US so long.
Unknown Speaker 25:10
I've had so many jobs where, like at the plasma center, we had to have two people in our little section. So, if you had to go to the bathroom, you have to find somebody to cover you. And I remember one time they like asked on the little walkie like, can anybody cover Alyssa while she goes to the bathroom?
Unknown Speaker 25:31
And then like, you definitely can't poop because like, everyone's gonna know that you're pooping.
Unknown Speaker 25:36
Well, some people didn't give a fuck, they'd be gone for like, 30 minutes. I'm like, I know. You're not just pooping. You're like fucking around on your phone or like, yeah,
Unknown Speaker 25:44
yeah. What about when you did? Um, I keep thinking about me, but not lowball me. You know?
Unknown Speaker 25:52
Don't people. Oh, yeah, that was fine. I mean, I would kind of have to plan that. Because like, if there was a funeral or something, or like, we're going to the cemetery, I would definitely need to go. But yeah, the the worst thing for bathrooms was phlebotomy? Because, you know, you'd have somebody like throwing a fit that they've been waiting forever. And, like, I'm about to piss my pants. Oh, yeah. Like, can you not give me attitude? Like,
Unknown Speaker 26:21
I just need like three minutes to pee and wash my hands.
Unknown Speaker 26:25
Yeah. And the blood center my last job it was, it was hard to do. And sometimes I would just like, stay in front of the donor and talk to a coworker and be like, I can't wait to go bathroom any longer. Like, I'll be back.
Unknown Speaker 26:43
like, Damn, that's crazy. Yeah, I don't think I've ever had that. big of a problem at a place.
Unknown Speaker 26:55
It was hard at the blood center, because we only had like, there were like two toilets in the whole building. So like if somebody that would like fuck it up, too, because somebody would be in there when you had a chance to go. So you had to like Yeah, yeah. From freedom is the best.
Unknown Speaker 27:10
Yes, it is.
Unknown Speaker 27:13
A lot of abuse to be like, I'm thankful for the bathroom. And
Unknown Speaker 27:21
yeah, it's a really, I don't know. It's such a demeaning thing to kind of like take away from someone. Yeah, it really was. It's just simple. Math. Yeah. But that's how they get Yeah, you know? Yeah. And for some reason, I was just like, I'm like with the embalming. I was like, Well, did you embalm
Unknown Speaker 27:47
ever or Okay, okay. Okay. That's what I mostly
Unknown Speaker 27:51
just like, do they just like make you just like, go, like, on? I don't know, on the table or something? Like, there's holes and stuff.
Unknown Speaker 28:01
There's holes. No, that was fine. Like, you could turn everything off and just go to the bathroom. Okay, cool.
Unknown Speaker 28:06
Cool. And you're like, like, be right back. Okay. Oh, God, have you ever had anything like? Like, I know, you're not like super superstitious stuff? Or, like, I don't know how super. Whatever. I still don't have stitches you are? Um, but like, did you ever have anything just like super scary happen where you just like thought it was like ghosts or anything weird.
Unknown Speaker 28:36
No, like, sometimes. Sounds stupid. But sometimes you just kind of get bad vibes from a person. Like, you're just like, I don't know, like, I can't put my finger on it. But I felt like you were probably like, kind of a shift person. Yeah. And then like, you know, there's one time that I got a weird feeling and then I found out that it was like somebody that did like some awful shit. Oh, oh, yeah. And spot on. But one funny thing. So, you know, you put their hands on top of their abdomen, like left hand over, right? Like in a resting position that way if you have a wedding ring, you know, see, okay. So sometimes, like, depending on the person's anatomy and their size, or whatever, sometimes it's kind of hard to like get the hands to balance. So one time, I like, had everything balanced. And I turned around and I got like, slapped in the butt. And it was a hand falling. I got slapped in the love I
Unknown Speaker 29:44
Oh, man that I would have like, really shit myself at first and then I probably wouldn't have left.
Unknown Speaker 29:50
I did Yes. Like what is that? Like, oh, you're you're being sassy.
Unknown Speaker 30:00
He even after death, he's a go getter. Um, yeah, yeah, bad vibes about people all the time, even when they're just alive.
Unknown Speaker 30:11
Oh yeah, me too. We were looking at houses online, just like kind of browsing. And there was a place that it used to be like a big vet clinic thing and it got turned into a house. And it was like, I don't know, I feel like that place would have bad vibes from all the animals like being nervous there and like dying there and stuff. And I was like, oh, place might have bad vibes and carb went over to Jason was like, well, vibe. Czarna things
Unknown Speaker 30:50
but like, oh, feels weird sometimes. Yeah, you might also be able to get a great discount. Yeah. And that's what I've kind of, because I've watched this one YouTube video that was like, mansions that just like, don't sell when no one wants to buy them because they have like, they're in a bad, like, super bad area or have to be relocated. costs money, blah, blah, blah. But like half of them were like, because it's haunted. And I was like, Shit, I could get a fucking mansion.
Unknown Speaker 31:24
Yeah, I mean, if it was like, an innocent kind of haunting shirt. If it was like, a million murders took place. Probably. I wouldn't want to be there.
Unknown Speaker 31:36
I would have to go there. And see how I feel. Yeah. Because I feel like I don't know. I'm not really like, big on on that stuff. I don't. I don't really vibe on that. Even though I'm using the word vibe, but I feel like I'm using it differently. But like, I like cuz I like I told Brandon I was like, I want to stay at the shining hotel like in Raleigh. I want to go see some more haunted because I just like, I don't know, I just kind of feel like Come at me, bro. Like, I just I want like, I have to be convinced like myself. And stuff. So like, yeah, come at me. And let me go.
Unknown Speaker 32:20
I think the either the lady that had her house before or her husband one of them died in the house. And I've never felt anything weird. I think they were probably cool people but I don't know if Oh, like one house that carboy number three, he was looking at it before we got together. It was a husband and wife and that he liked murder suicide of them. And I was like, I don't know if I would want that house. That's pretty.
Unknown Speaker 32:46
Yeah, that's pretty scary. Yeah. Has a lot of history though. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 32:53
it's true.
Unknown Speaker 32:54
Yeah, and like with I guess, Brian me a little bit about the Amityville Horror house or whatever, like, they were just like crackheads,
Unknown Speaker 33:04
or whatever. Like, uh I watched like that just like a thing on it a long time ago, but they were like,
Unknown Speaker 33:11
involved with like, big name people that sold drugs and all that stuff. And they like constructed a whole story to like, get away with crimes and shit. Good stuff.
Unknown Speaker 33:31
If we ever start a second podcast, we should do a true crime. Spooky one.
Unknown Speaker 33:36
Yes. That would be a lot of fun. Yeah, it would. It would be more time consuming the most one for sure. The research and stuff. But um, if y'all want us to do it, let us know.
Unknown Speaker 33:52
Yeah, I would love to just like sit here and
Unknown Speaker 33:55
be like
Unknown Speaker 33:58
John Wayne Gacy is a fucking idiot. Like in this picture how stupid he looked.
Unknown Speaker 34:05
He does look really dumb. Yeah, and like, who the WHO THE FUCK orders KFC for their last meal do
Unknown Speaker 34:12
Oh, he did. Oh,
Unknown Speaker 34:14
yeah. KFC and strawberries.
Unknown Speaker 34:17
For Canadian. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 34:18
I mean, I assume the KFC because he was like a manager. But like, I would be like, I want to eat food from the place I managed.
Unknown Speaker 34:27
Yeah, that's the last shit at every day. What a dumbass.
Unknown Speaker 34:33
Oh, yeah, he's a loser. And I guess that's like, maybe that's the most like pride he ever felt in his life.
Unknown Speaker 34:39
Oh, managing the amp. Yeah. What was your last meal be?
Unknown Speaker 34:44
Um, I don't know. My brain thinks of a couple things. The first thing I thought of was this, like, cheesy chicken and like mushroom sauce that my mom used to make. Cuz it was like my favorite. And pizza. Nice some pizza. I love veal. 313 Pizza. Maybe that
Unknown Speaker 35:10
I would probably do like a little bit of everything.
Unknown Speaker 35:12
Yeah. Get a little buffet going on. Yeah, that's what I would do. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 35:16
Be like you're gonna have to clean up a lot of shit from this chair when I die I feel like I'm being extra gross today.
Unknown Speaker 35:31
Man, I wonder. I wonder how they like prepare for that. I wonder if they do just have someone clean it up. Or if they own because I assume they wouldn't just like make a prisoner wear a diaper as they're dying, because it's kind of like degrading. Maybe they don't. I don't know if I should care about someone on death row. Or if they just have like a little bucket.
Unknown Speaker 35:58
They probably just wipe it up. I mean,
Unknown Speaker 36:01
yeah, I guess most of it would kind of stay in, like in the pants and stuff. Yeah, and not everybody does that when they die. I mean, it just kind of depends.
Unknown Speaker 36:10
But um, yeah, diverse.
Unknown Speaker 36:14
I was thinking about how you're talking about the people that like don't poop. Like for like days at a time. I'm like, those are gonna be the people that like oh my god just fucking rips out 50 pounds of poop. Poop mountain.
Unknown Speaker 36:31
happen at the funeral home. I'd be like, Man space. Just poops like the only thing that really bothers me.
Unknown Speaker 36:42
Yeah, pooping syrup for me. And I guess pee my most bodily fluids that are warm. Yeah, the warm part. Not fun. Talk. Um, do we have any more like period or two? This is a podcast, Triple P. The other day.
Unknown Speaker 37:11
Like doing the hashtags for the pod is like poop story. Diarrhea. Hashtag P
Unknown Speaker 37:19
fart stories. Funny fart stories on I haven't used yet. But yeah, poop. Poop and throw up hashtags.
Unknown Speaker 37:37
I need to look at some of the other like, hashtags that we have in common with other things. Like, I wonder what they're talking about? Or like, wait, you know why they're hashtagging it?
Unknown Speaker 37:48
Yeah, that's a good idea. Or if anyone's even using? Am I doing it wrong? I don't fucking know. Yeah, um, I do have a little side story to share if we are ready to move on from her period. Um, so a really long time ago, I was on. I think it was like middle school or like the beginning of high school. But me and my friend at the time decided to skip school. I can't remember if we just decided to or if we missed the bus and we're just like, forget. Yeah, we're just like, oh, well, let's just like not call our parents because you know, missed the bus call your parents to get picked up. Like you're gonna be in trouble.
Unknown Speaker 38:36
Yeah, there's gonna be a lot of yelling. Yeah, this is your one job. Anyway, sorry. No, no.
Unknown Speaker 38:47
And so, um, so, like, we went back to my house, but like, I couldn't remember I there was some reason we didn't go to my house. I can't remember why. And then we went to her house
Unknown Speaker 39:04
because no one was home. So we're like, Cool. We'll be able to get in through a window or something. We couldn't. So we did the not next logical thing to us. I went to the cemetery, because that was one of our Hangout places. And then we found this little section of it was, it wasn't like a like, completely like Woods area, but it was just like a smaller brushy area with small trees. And, um, we built like a little fort and layer like because like not far off from the cemetery was a whole thing along Long power lines where people would dump trash, and like car parts and you're like, yes, we'll be great. I got like some tires and stuff like that and brought it back or use it as like chairs and stuff like that. And we called it um, who was it the Michael Jackson. We called it Neverland Ranch funny for a long time it's like tires and like all trash next, like in a cemetery Oh, wait, there's more. Shut up. Do you have more to put into you know? Um, yeah. And so, um, if I remember, right, we had, like, we were reading like astrology books and stuff because it was like what we have. Um, and we were really, really hungry. And thirsty. And so, like, we didn't have a way to get food. So we're like, well, let's call Domino's, and we'll get it ordered delivered to the cemetery. And then when no one shows up to like, grab the pizza, they'll just leave it like
Unknown Speaker 41:49
that goes to Oh, that's awesome. Okay, so
Unknown Speaker 42:02
so they wouldn't take her order because they still they wouldn't deliver to the cemetery. And so,
Unknown Speaker 42:10
um, solid plan though. Yeah, yeah. And so
Unknown Speaker 42:13
we went on the search for water. And we found this little, like, creaky thing. And we drink water from it. And we're probably really lucky. In the second day, or something like, look, I found the cup. We
Unknown Speaker 42:32
we use their hands. But yes, like, if we found cups out there. I mean, I remember one time we found a beer. It was an open beer and split it. And it wasn't in the woods, per se. It was like by a golf course.
Unknown Speaker 42:54
Okay, I guess maybe somebody just forgot.
Unknown Speaker 43:00
No. Open cannon for open bottle of beer.
Unknown Speaker 43:07
Like, Oh, this one doesn't even have any cigarette.
Unknown Speaker 43:12
Oh, and we found a pack of cigarettes one time, too. It wasn't a full pack. But we're like, oh, he's ours. Man.
Unknown Speaker 43:21
That's so funny. So Did y'all ever go back to Neverland? Right? Yeah, yeah, we
Unknown Speaker 43:25
went there a lot. Actually.
Unknown Speaker 43:27
Did you ever like make a sign for it?
Unknown Speaker 43:30
No. Um, unfortunately, like didn't stick around for long because they had to like demolish that part of the like brushes and woods to make more room for the cemetery.
Unknown Speaker 43:41
So now there's a corpse and Neverland right
Unknown Speaker 43:47
yes. I'm wondering the people that had to like clear that area
Unknown Speaker 43:53
out. Like what a weird collection of shit to dislike. Because like, I'm pretty sure we probably love some like drawings and stuff too.
Unknown Speaker 44:10
But yeah, that was a we probably made a paper assignments of Neverland ranch or something. But yeah, that was my story of Neverland Ranch.
Unknown Speaker 44:20
If you want to make like a recreation of the sign that would be awesome.
Unknown Speaker 44:25
Yeah, maybe I'll just like you could draw the whole place I think I'm I think I might have actually sketched it out when I was a kid. So maybe I can find that and get a picture. Oh, yeah. Also, like, redraw it as I as I remember it. How close was it to graves? I'm not that far at all. Like maybe like 10 to 20 feet. Like it wasn't far like both or we made Neverland Ranch we would go just hanging out at the cemetery because they had some different benches and stuff and we had some of our favorite like gravesite. I know that sounds weird, but like some of the little wasn't like a mausoleum but like the building just like just the concrete structure above ground. Like some of those are really pretty, really pretty stuff. And I'm just gonna walk around and just like pick up all the flowers and I don't know why I ended that. I wouldn't even consider myself like, like goth or anything. But like, that's what I did.
Unknown Speaker 45:42
Neverland Ranch.
Unknown Speaker 45:43
Yeah. And I had a friend that would like walk. He like walked over people's grave. Sometimes I'd be like, Dude, it's so fucking like, rude. I don't like that. Um, and there was a summer in the woods. There was like a it seemed like a slight small and kind of forgotten bug grave. Like these little fence around it. Oh, it was all like, kind of like falling over and like grown over and stuff. And I don't know, I just always thought it was cool when I was a kid because I was like, super creepy. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 46:19
when we were looking at houses, we found this. Oh, sorry. We had this. We found this one that had like a little cemetery in it. And I was like, hell yeah.
Unknown Speaker 46:28
Wait in it like, well, it was like a,
Unknown Speaker 46:31
you know, chunk of land. And there was a part that had a cemetery. Oh, cool. I was like, This is what I always wanted as a kid. I would make like my stems house and I would like intentionally kill people so that I could have a graveyard. And it was cool. Because sometimes at night, like a little ghost would like pop up out of the grave and like walk around the cemetery and then yeah, I don't know. What was it about? Had my first kiss so cemetery? Oh, lucky. Yeah. How romantic.
Unknown Speaker 47:13
Yeah, totally. was a gay guy.
Unknown Speaker 47:18
My first couple of boyfriends were gay. Oh, yeah. They were just, you know, kind of like middle school just like little. Like, we didn't kiss or anything. boyfriends.
Unknown Speaker 47:28
Yeah, my friend was like, well, maybe I'm not gay. And he was like, Yeah, I'm gay.
Unknown Speaker 47:34
After kissing at least they knew after dating us. Yeah. Yeah, there's a just a few few other guys that I dated before. Before this, this one the final one. And yeah, I guess we'll see what happens with them. None of them are dating anyone? Oh, so we'll see.
Unknown Speaker 48:04
We'll see how they go. Yeah, I don't know about well, I know two guys that I previously dated, like,
Unknown Speaker 48:10
have kids and stuff now.
Unknown Speaker 48:14
The last one that I dated before a car boy number three. He was a fucking train wreck. And like, right after we broke up, he like got with some girl and got her pregnant. I was like, Oh, thank you for being her. Not me. Yeah. And her name was like the same as mine. But a couple letters were different. So it like sounded the same. I won't say what it was. Is just because trying to guess it's a weird one. So I feel like I can't say it because people would
Unknown Speaker 48:47
be able to. Yeah, I'll tell you after. It's always weird when you see a guide date someone that's like, or an ex boyfriend date someone that like looks like you or like and people are like there's nothing wrong with having a type. It's like, yeah, I get that. There's like having a type but then there's also just being lacking. Yeah. That's weird. Oh, yeah. Didn't you say that you had something that happened like not too long ago, like or whatever.
Unknown Speaker 49:25
Yeah. So I went to yoga before I came to Jamie's at my gym and ailed okay, it was short notice, so I was just like, oh, yeah, that's today. But it was nice, but I was the only one there. So my original plan was to like take a shower at the gym. But since I was the only one there I was like, oh, I need to leave so the other person can leave. And so I came to Jamie's and took a shower. And like, I got in there, and I kind of started slipping through My first thought was like oh my god like Jake It's gonna like knock me out and Jamie's gonna fight and I just use the like sheer like will of not wanting that to happen to like myself
Unknown Speaker 50:20
thank you for thinking of me
Unknown Speaker 50:27
because the way I was falling I feel like my legs would have like just like gone over like been inside the tub and I would have like gone I can't even explain it but
Unknown Speaker 50:40
yeah
Unknown Speaker 50:43
maybe I should put some kind of like anti slip thing in there
Unknown Speaker 50:46
I think it's just me
Unknown Speaker 50:50
I'm I'm sorry I feel bad like a really bad host
Unknown Speaker 50:56
No, it was just me like
Unknown Speaker 50:58
if I have a request like would you like me to just like position you in a certain way I guess maybe
Unknown Speaker 51:09
just like put a towel over me for modesty and then call 911 I guess if my eyes are open and like maybe like close my eyes
Unknown Speaker 51:24
are hanging out that's fine um the other day I was thinking about opening with this but I wouldn't with the delicious Alicia Silverstone thing instead. Um, but I took a shower the other day I went to my closet to get dressed and I'm like I'm I dropped my deodorant so I just bent over pick it up. I'm like as I came off my butt like pinched one of my clothing items that were saying it was just like poop and I was like so that can happen.
Unknown Speaker 52:05
I totally thought you're gonna say you diary it again?
Unknown Speaker 52:08
Yeah, however like my my nicest Sunday dress. I remember my dad told me the story. It probably didn't happen. But um, he said one time when he went to go get his like exam. The man exam though. Um, the doctor the glove got, like stuck in my dad's but because the doctor was pulling it out and it like, snapped the glove off. But I doubt that happen because my dad makes up.
Unknown Speaker 52:41
He's like, My butt is so until since I'm so not gay. It just goes straight, like Yeah, that's that's a man and no that's very sexist of me. It could have been a lady doctor. Wow. Yes.
Unknown Speaker 53:05
That's a finger. That's something I'm Oh man. I'm Brandon had a really good joke today. Oh, it's Doctor Who related so nevermind. I'm not gonna say it. Cuz why not? Oh, because it's just like, so. I guess I can kind of explain it. So, Doctor Who I haven't watched it for a few for a while. But um, the doctor is a Timelord Timelords have 12 different lives. And I guess you could say like, they'll just regenerate and come back as a different person. So if you ever hear there's a new doctor, that's what they mean. There's a new one. Now, and I was like, I was like, man, maybe I should watch it again. I'm kind of interested to see how they like worked out like, um, you know, going past 12. And Brandon is just like, he was just like, he's like, capitalism, like, doesn't follow storylines. Whatever. And he was like, Oh, that's really, really good. Oh, yay, capitalist.
Unknown Speaker 54:15
Yay. It makes it so we can't go to the bathroom because you're everyone's yelling if you take too long
Unknown Speaker 54:24
Amazon employees get like, I mean, like they get fucked not like get fired. I'm not telling them to get fired. They are getting fucked. Um, so yeah, I need to cancel my Amazon Prime soon. And they obtained shutter so I'm kind of annoyed. So, but All right, that's all we got for you fat heads. So again. Have a good week. Sorry. I'm sorry. I'm here.
Unknown Speaker 55:01
Like
Unknown Speaker 55:03
Like subscribe do all the things
Unknown Speaker 55:07
for you rate and review us it would be cool to get another review yeah when coin coin on Spotify
Unknown Speaker 55:13
or whatever We'll read them yep right here on the podcast
Unknown Speaker 55:19
bonus extra credit if you just send us a screenshot because I feel bad but one time it took me a little bit to find the review and I was like how long
Unknown Speaker 55:28
yes it is a screenshot because like I don't I only really use Spotify like for me to check Apple podcast is like such a task because I have to like log into like an apple thing Yeah, I have to use my work and for me I don't have like a personal Apple accounts like check on my work and check that
Unknown Speaker 55:49
one but like everything else I'm like
Unknown Speaker 55:53
yeah, I don't don't recall what all were on but I just went through like the list and added us to a bunch of stuff.
Unknown Speaker 55:59
Oh, hell yeah.
Unknown Speaker 56:02
It doesn't say if we're not on a platform that you want to hear us on let us know but you're probably not hearing this case so Okay, anyway, we rambled on enough love you