Join us as Alyssa covers some men’s entertainment, which includes an interview with Debra Murphree about some of the sultry details about Jimmy Swaggart!
Join us as Alyssa covers some men’s entertainment, which includes an interview with Debra Murphree about some of the sultry details about Jimmy Swaggart!
Write us some of your cringe stories at nervouslaughterpodcast@gmail.com
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Buy your own Penthouse July 1988 issue!
Speaker 1 0:00
So Jamie, remember a couple episodes back when we talked about the oatmeal ass bitch? Yeah, and we were talking about his house being huge. It's 17,000 square feet. And I said, I wonder how many mouthwash cups that is? Oh, yes. So carboy number three did the mental math. He did this in his head and figured out how many for us. Yeah, oh, so a 17,000 square foot house would be 2,448,000 mouthwash cups.
Unknown Speaker 0:53
Oh, 2 million, I'm imagining myself like Angel, rolling out all the cups just like it's a dream come true.
Unknown Speaker 1:05
That's awesome. Thank you. Carboy,
Speaker 1 1:07
yes. He was like, well, since the mouthwash cups are round, this is about as close as we can get, since there will be some dead space around them. I was like, that is totally fine. I feel
Speaker 2 1:22
like I would have been like, okay, but we could split this mouthwash cup and put it along the edge and that would be one cup. No, yeah, 2 million is close enough.
Speaker 1 1:31
Yes, almost 2.5 million, but, yeah, you are our angels that we do in mouthwash, cups fat heads. So my welcome to nervous laughter Podcast. I'm
Unknown Speaker 1:47
Jamie.
Unknown Speaker 1:48
I'm Alyssa. It didn't mean to cut you off.
Unknown Speaker 1:51
No, I think I was just, I was just gonna say,
Unknown Speaker 1:58
my pink underwear with bananas,
Unknown Speaker 2:01
I'm chewing the angels
Speaker 1 2:07
on those you need to take off for this episode. If you're wearing a little skirt made out of a towel, just toss that to the side.
Speaker 2 2:16
Whether or not there's a delivery man there, you know what?
Speaker 1 2:19
Especially if there's a delivery man there, yeah, I'm sure they would love it.
Speaker 1 2:32
But today we are going to be talking about something that I said I wanted to order on eBay, and I did, yeah, yeah. So I have ordered the July 1988 edition of penthouse, the international magazine for man. Journalism, journalism, journalism.
Unknown Speaker 2:55
So this is the
Unknown Speaker 2:59
not episode. Fuck. What's it called? Issue
Speaker 1 3:04
magazine, hard copy episode, yes, this was the issue where they talked to Deborah Murphree, who was the sex worker that was with Jimmy Swaggart, the preacher that cried and forgive me. Well, get ready to laugh about him. Yes, I love laughing about him. So I guess first I'll talk about this magazine. Penthouse is definitely a
Unknown Speaker 3:40
it's nasty.
Speaker 1 3:43
I didn't realize that it was, like, full on pornography. I mean, because Playboy, like, it has naked ladies, but this has like, people having sex in it, which I didn't realize, but it's tasteful, isn't it? So imagine you took a camera and got it like a mouthwash cup distance away from a woman's vagina. That's what
Unknown Speaker 4:11
this magazine is like.
Speaker 2 4:15
Not a vagina fan, but some are
Unknown Speaker 4:20
like, I am not at all.
Speaker 1 4:25
Looks very weird some of these. So since this magazine was in the late 80s, there's a lot of great ads. As Jamie pointed out, in seeing the magazine, on the back there is a cigarette ad, which we don't see anymore. I made a list of all the kind of crazy ads that are in this magazine. Oh, perfect. So would you like to guess how many cigarette ads are in this magazine?
Unknown Speaker 4:55
1210,
Speaker 2 4:58
oh, that was my first guess. But I was. Like, I have to up it, because I always guess low.
Speaker 1 5:03
So I'm going to show you my favorite one. It is really weird. Are they all kind of like sexy or No, this one is okay, very odd. I didn't
Speaker 2 5:14
know if they would make like specific, targeted ads
Speaker 1 5:19
for a couple things that are sexy, but it's a more generic. Yeah, so this one, the people are alive with pleasure, and I'll be putting all this on Instagram that I can but it's two people holding chairs over their heads, like outside chairs.
Unknown Speaker 5:39
Yeah,
Speaker 3 5:41
I don't know what that's supposed to symbolize.
Speaker 1 5:44
I don't know because it says Newport. After all, if smoking isn't a pleasure, why bother like, I guess chairs on your head are pleasures. It's not a word, no, it is. They're
Speaker 2 5:58
being silly. They're just being a couple silly, goofy,
Speaker 1 6:03
silly, goofy moods, for sure, but I thought you would like that one.
Speaker 2 6:07
It's like one of those. It's like one of those things you ever see, like background actors and stuff, when you're just like, why are they doing that? It's kind of like a bad thing.
Speaker 1 6:20
So as far as liquor or beer, we also have 10 ads for that. Okay,
Unknown Speaker 6:27
we have two ads for boner supplements. Oh, so,
Unknown Speaker 6:30
of course, need some boner vitamins.
Speaker 1 6:35
We have one ad for a gun that is a John Wayne gun replica, and it's framed, oh so manly man.
Unknown Speaker 6:45
It's a replica. At first I was like, like a
Speaker 3 6:48
functional gun replica is, I don't know, I want to say I give it a little more
Unknown Speaker 6:54
of a pass for being a replica,
Unknown Speaker 6:56
but it's kind of
Unknown Speaker 6:59
my favorite cowboy.
Unknown Speaker 7:02
That's why I get penthouse for the ads.
Unknown Speaker 7:08
We do have one ad for a knife, though,
Speaker 1 7:13
we have three ads for condoms, and I'd like to show you a couple of them, because they're pretty funny. One of them is actually a good invention,
Unknown Speaker 7:25
sorry, as I flip through all these vaginas.
Speaker 1 7:31
So this one is a guy. It's a black and white picture, and it says prevention is better than cure. And then in the corner, it says, don't die from embarrassment. Now you can purchase, in the privacy of your own home, caution condoms, which I don't know what the fuck that is, one box of 144 individually wrapped condoms at a discounted price of only $55 yeah, if you're kind of embarrassed, you know, I feel like this was the male version of us.
Unknown Speaker 8:04
Glasses. Yeah, I
Unknown Speaker 8:05
want to go to the store. It's like, I
Unknown Speaker 8:10
don't go to clubs. I'd
Unknown Speaker 8:11
rather curl up with a nice book.
Unknown Speaker 8:13
They're like,
Speaker 2 8:16
funny though at the bottom. And it's kind of like, biggest text, don't die from embarrassment, and what I don't understand, what the embarrassment is like, what getting everybody pregnant or contracting an STD? I guess he doesn't
Speaker 1 8:29
want people to know that he does it, that he like, does sex. Maybe I don't know, just having
Unknown Speaker 8:36
to check out in wine
Speaker 1 8:39
is what I think maybe it is. I don't know, but I thought it was a weird ad, but this is the one that I thought was a good idea. Because, you know, there was, like, that whole thing where people were like, Oh, I keep a condom in my wallet so I'm always ready. But that's actually bad, because your body heat, yeah, degrades it so you have a little condom carrying case. Oh, my God, I'm actually like, that's a really, that's a nice idea, and then it can't get poked or, yeah, kind of
Speaker 2 9:11
nice. I almost feel like they should just make condom packages that way, but I can understand why they don't,
Unknown Speaker 9:17
yeah, but yeah, um, it's
Speaker 1 9:20
called the safeman because it's a good idea, the ultimate in sexual discretion. And you can choose the color you want. Oh, you can get it as a pendant. You just wear a condom thing. You can get a money clip. If you're a baller you wanna impress the ladies a key ring or belt clips. Yeah, like to flex your pager?
Speaker 2 9:55
Booty call you. So funny. I thought you're gonna say a bottle opener, a fridge magnet. Oh, man, so many applique if that's not so product, maybe we should, yeah, look into bringing it back. Great
Unknown Speaker 10:13
product, if
Speaker 2 10:14
we can make it slim enough. Well, it doesn't matter if it's keychain or whatever,
Speaker 1 10:18
yeah, yeah. I mean, you could keep one or two in there, you know, and you just restock. That's fun.
Unknown Speaker 10:25
Oh, my God. Like a restocking video.
Unknown Speaker 10:37
Like, yeah, they do the hand sanitizer. Like,
Unknown Speaker 10:42
since, for spray. Oh,
Unknown Speaker 10:43
yeah, okay. Oh, that's amazing.
Speaker 1 10:48
There's one cologne ad that I thought you would like, sorry, I should have, like, dog eared the pages, but I didn't want to mess up my pristine say, Don't
Unknown Speaker 11:00
fold it.
Speaker 1 11:03
So this is a cologne called Cool musk. It's a cartoon. It says when the heat is on, and then it has the picture of the Cologne. It says, English leather, cool Musk for hot guys, kind
Speaker 2 11:21
of looks like a Barbie ad. It does Barbie slash Baywatch,
Unknown Speaker 11:25
yeah, it does.
Unknown Speaker 11:29
She is wearing a red bathing suit, like a Baywatch.
Speaker 2 11:31
You know, that's like early AX ad, almost, kind of, it is.
Unknown Speaker 11:39
They also
Speaker 1 11:40
have, if you like smoking doobies, they actually have a grow kit in this magazine, which is kind of cool. Yeah, it's like, if you want to grow your own. And they have two different ads for cigarette papers. This one is my favorite. It's fucking terrifying. It's papers called Joker, and it says there's a joker at every party. And then it has the scariest that's crazy. It kind of looks like a Marty girl ad. And then he has a little doll of himself in his hand. I have no fucking idea. I'm
Unknown Speaker 12:21
surprised he doesn't have a chair on his head.
Unknown Speaker 12:24
That was the cool thing to do in the 80s.
Speaker 2 12:27
Also, cool Musk just keeps getting, like whispered in my head, fried chili or whatever. Fragguccini,
Unknown Speaker 12:44
oh, god, yeah. Just it sounds like that would smell very bad. Yeah.
Speaker 1 12:49
The last picture that I want to show you before I start on the article. So I guess the Cover Girl of the month, or whatever, is called the penthouse pet of the month, which feels very gross. Yeah, it does, but I want to show you my favorite picture of her, because it's so fucking insane.
Unknown Speaker 13:13
Is that okay if I show it to you? Okay, would you like to
Speaker 2 13:25
describe this? I feel like this would be great on that fish Twitter.
Unknown Speaker 13:31
Like fishing hot.
Speaker 3 13:38
So it's a naked woman? Yeah, she's
Speaker 2 13:43
in great shape. She looks great. She's sitting with her legs spread open and her arms like open, like she's chilling on a couch all naked, natural, you know, and she's got a very nice belt of bullets. Yes, I feel like that would be a very hot hit today.
Speaker 1 14:00
Yeah, this is, this is what, like, Maga porn
Unknown Speaker 14:06
girls with bullet bolsters,
Speaker 2 14:08
yeah, oh yeah. I told I can totally see it. Yeah, I'm surprised to have, like, the condom clip on there.
Unknown Speaker 14:18
Oh, my God, I'm gonna get us those guns also
Unknown Speaker 14:21
have clips. So
Speaker 2 14:28
shoot my Well, I don't know. I'm trying to make a gun condom shooting load joke. I can't think of it. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 14:34
I mean, that's a lot of moving pieces. It did great. Okay, so I'm going to talk about the article that's in here about swag right now, honestly, kind of boring. I just got some highlights from it because it was a pretty long article, and we talked about those motherfuckers enough. I'm not going to talk about them anymore, really. Uh. But a couple things about the article. It's called Jimmy Swaggart, secret sex life, and it's by art Harris and Jason Berry. And then we have a separate portion called Debbie does Swaggart, which is photographed by Anthony sow. And wait, sorry, what is this that's choreographed or photographed. Oh, okay.
Unknown Speaker 15:23
I was like, What are they doing? Oh,
Speaker 1 15:27
they are. Oh, God, we'll get to that. So the opening of the article is a Bible verse, which I thought was cool. I liked it. It says, Beware of false prophets which come to you in sheep's clothing. But inwardly they are ravening wolves. Oh, that's Mark, chapter seven, verse 15.
Speaker 2 15:53
But inwardly they are horny perverts that don't care about people. Yes, shitty. Um, I think then I referred
Speaker 1 16:04
to Deborah as Rosemary last episode. That's not correct. Her name is Deborah Murphree. She's the one that this article is about. So the article, I feel like it didn't talk about her enough. I wanted more about her. But of course, it's penthouse, so like, let's talk about what these men do.
Speaker 2 16:26
Kind of a waste. Women aren't there during sex. Yeah, they're just there. They're not there.
Unknown Speaker 16:32
Like, how we're there. Um,
Speaker 3 16:36
but I really like this line
Speaker 1 16:41
that they wrote in the article Jimmy Swaggart was fear. He was a furry cruising for sex, wrestling Satan in his own dark urges down on the Bayou, Louisiana, which I love. I like the thing through Louisiana, Sex
Unknown Speaker 17:02
on the Bayou, sex by you.
Speaker 1 17:09
They tried to get a comment from Jimmy swaggarts lawyer, and
Unknown Speaker 17:15
his name is Bill treby.
Speaker 1 17:20
So Bill treby of New Orleans has repeatedly declined to discuss his client's low rent rendezvous. I
Unknown Speaker 17:29
like the wording of it.
Unknown Speaker 17:32
That is like a very like Louisiana way
Unknown Speaker 17:34
to say that rendezvous.
Unknown Speaker 17:38
I imagine it like, like when Bobby Hill
Unknown Speaker 17:41
this flower. I love that
Unknown Speaker 17:45
episode. Um,
Speaker 1 17:50
so she talks about when she first met swagger. She said he wore a headband, t shirt and baggy jogging pants split at the crotch.
Speaker 2 18:06
Did he just come from the gym? Or is he is this like an exercise? It's a plan.
Speaker 1 18:10
So it's a headband. He's trying to look incognito, because usually he's wearing a suit.
Unknown Speaker 18:17
Oh god, it's so funny.
Speaker 1 18:19
So Debbie said that he had the crotch of his pants ripped so he wouldn't have to pull his pants all the way down.
Unknown Speaker 18:28
Is he like a never nude?
Speaker 2 18:34
I mean, I don't know if it's like a real thing, but in Arrested Development, one of the characters never nude, and so he, like, even has to wear, like, underwear in the shower. Oh my gosh,
Unknown Speaker 18:47
he probably is a never nude. For
Speaker 2 18:50
some reason I feel like he's just self conscious about his butt. I don't know why, but that's just like the feeling is he,
Speaker 1 18:57
uh, he does have his butt covered, you know, he has the crotch hole, and then he puts a white handkerchief over the crotch hole so nobody will see that his pants are ripped when he's like, driving there. Oh, so he just, like, takes the handkerchief off, and then he can pop his peanut out of the hole that he ripped in sweatpants.
Unknown Speaker 19:22
Even know how you do when you hook up
Speaker 2 19:25
like his wife sees him leaving the house. She's like, Oh, honey, where are you? And she notices the hole in the pants, and she's like, Oh, okay. She
Unknown Speaker 19:33
looks up the window with dinner
Unknown Speaker 19:35
ready when you get
Unknown Speaker 19:41
so fucking ridiculous. Actually,
Speaker 1 19:46
I'll get to that part here in a second. So I'm gonna go to the pictures, because, like I said, the article kind of boring. So here we have her. Debbie does swagger.
Speaker 2 19:58
She looks like someone. That would, like, tell someone off. Like, yeah, I feel like she, I don't know anything about this woman, but I feel like if she was like, a lawyer or someone in Congress, she would fucking shut some people
Unknown Speaker 20:14
down. She would fuck shit up.
Speaker 1 20:18
This is one of my favorite things. So this photo shoot is basically her in poses that swagger wanted her in.
Unknown Speaker 20:29
Oh, really, yeah.
Unknown Speaker 20:31
So this
Speaker 2 20:33
is really interesting journalism. I know it's like weird, but they're just like, just like, what poses did you do? Like No Other journalist would ever ask that, except for penthouse, very creative.
Speaker 1 20:46
So one of the things swagger liked to have her do was wear her underwear, and then, like, pull it up. So he liked to wear her underwear. No, like she would wear, be wearing her underwear. Okay, okay. And then he wanted her to, like, pull it up so it made like a thong with her front butt, oh, like,
Unknown Speaker 21:09
and I have a photo of her doing it
Speaker 2 21:12
looks like she's laughing too. She's like, I don't know why. This
Unknown Speaker 21:18
is what he really wanted me to do. My way, 30
Unknown Speaker 21:25
years before he came out, he's like, pull your underwear out. All right, call
Unknown Speaker 21:29
me your wife.
Speaker 1 21:35
Yeah, these pictures are black and white, but I bet these underwear were neon green, like bore out. Oh, um. I love this picture. It's her standing in front of a billboard that says, Jesus said, unless a man is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. John three, three, your eternity is at stake, and there's like a train behind it. She's standing with a trench coat on, but it's open, and her Bush is so bushy that it looks like she's wearing a bikini bottom, not to Bush. Yeah, but, yeah,
Unknown Speaker 22:15
that's pretty you know, I like that. I'm
Unknown Speaker 22:17
gonna give this, yeah, two thumbs up. Yeah.
Speaker 1 22:18
Love that. I feel like that's the best picture. Oh no, my special edition magazine. Um, oh yeah. Here's another view of her doing the front butt thing from autumn. Yeah,
Speaker 2 22:36
there's a upskirt like angle of the the Borat underwear.
Speaker 1 22:41
Um, here is
Unknown Speaker 22:47
this one like, I guess he liked her sorry
Unknown Speaker 22:49
to see, like a butt on the other
Speaker 1 22:53
side. I guess he liked her to get, like, on her hands and knees. But this how she's holding her body. She's not trying to do it in a sexy way. It looks like she's waiting for someone to give her an enema, like she's not
Unknown Speaker 23:13
like when a horse is being inseminated, just there
Unknown Speaker 23:20
to prepare for action, I
Speaker 1 23:23
guess, praise for impact. Yes, exactly, yeah. Um, let's see. Oh,
Unknown Speaker 23:32
so these are the really graphic ones.
Speaker 1 23:37
I don't even know if I want to, like, talk about it. Um, basically, he wanted to watch her do things to herself, and penthouse took some, oh, very creative liberties.
Unknown Speaker 23:56
That is about a mouth cup away. Yeah,
Speaker 1 23:58
there are so many photos in this magazine like that, so I think that's enough of that.
Speaker 2 24:10
As I was showing you that I was like, what if Jamie hates me from showing you this, you can never come back to my house again.
Speaker 1 24:18
I did try to show one of her cats, the magazine.
Speaker 2 24:21
I was not okay with that. I had to cover Sam's eyes, yes,
Speaker 1 24:27
yeah, but I feel like this was definitely worth $10 um, it's a very weird time capsule. I really like the ads, yeah. I
Unknown Speaker 24:36
think even the ads alone is, there's a 10 bucks Trojan
Speaker 1 24:39
ad with extra secure love people, what
Unknown Speaker 24:43
does that say underneath that? Or is that an article title
Speaker 1 24:46
now Trojan plus two equals extra protection. Be extra secure in love.
Speaker 3 24:54
The plus two makes it sound like it's doubled up and not gonna work. Okay,
Unknown Speaker 25:02
not gonna work. But yeah, that's fun stuff.
Speaker 2 25:05
Yeah, thank you for taking us through that. That was a fun, fun adventure with some turns. Yeah,
Speaker 1 25:12
if, if you want to see the front butt picture, I'll send it to you, but only if you want to see it in a funny way, not if you're being a creep. And I'll probably be able to tell which, but I guess if I don't know, I just won't send it to you. Yeah,
Speaker 2 25:31
if you want to be a creep, just look up the magazine instead of trademarks. Just buy
Speaker 1 25:35
it on eBay. And I will say, for being 1988 I feel like this is great condition. I feel Yeah, I'm kind of, I'm surprised I did this on the corner. Kind of tore it, um, but yeah, it came in plastic. None of the pages are wavy.
Unknown Speaker 25:51
None of them are stuck together. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 25:55
it's in great condition. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 25:58
they must have just got, got it for the articles. Yeah?
Speaker 1 26:02
And then I wanted to talk about another men's magazine, which this just spirals into something beautiful that I love. So there's another men's magazine called hustler. And one of my coworkers a long time ago, he was older than me, and he told me that hustler would do this thing called Beaver hunt, which is where they would get young ladies to send in pictures, much like we saw today, where it's very close up. And that was a big thing, so much so that they have a magazine called Beaver hunt now where it's
Speaker 2 26:46
just a bunch of close ups, yes, so fucking gross.
Unknown Speaker 26:49
And these are just like
Unknown Speaker 26:52
random submitted
Unknown Speaker 26:55
or anything like specific anyone can
Speaker 1 26:57
participate in Beaver hunt. So I guess now it's not a regular thing. It only comes out a couple times a year. It's beaver season again.
Speaker 1 27:18
I think that's how men Breathe. Get the beaver hunt magazine. They're not capable of breathing with their mouth closed. They have kind of changed the name of the magazine over the years, and I just like the different variations. So they have hustler beaver hunt the best of hustler. Beaver hunt. Hustler, best of beaver. And I just like the different, like changes to it. But I was on Wikipedia because I thought I would find a little more about that, because it's just kind of a weird, funny thing. So I'm looking on Wikipedia very short, but they do have the website for beaver hunt listed, which is, of course, beaver hunt.com he clicked on it, and, you know, I had to press the thing saying I was 18, but I was not prepared for it was just like, boom, you know, right away, it was a Donald Trump parody.
Unknown Speaker 28:31
So it was him beaver.
Speaker 1 28:34
Someone make him a vagina. Maybe they just kind of use the name because people know it, but it was just like a porn site, okay, so they have this Donald Trump thing going. It starts playing, and I'm like, oh shit. Like, Well, my work computer, like, we had a customer drop off a car. What if he walks in? So,
Speaker 2 29:01
it, for some reason I would be scared a customer would like, come around and look through the window and like, even though that would never happen. But,
Speaker 1 29:10
you know, yeah, it was like, there have been customers here today. Oh, my God. But before I closed out, I had to get this picture, because I was very excited.
Unknown Speaker 29:20
Be so funny if you just accidentally left.
Speaker 2 29:27
George walks customers through and they're like, what the he's like? I don't even know what my wife's up to.
Speaker 1 29:35
Well, I'll tell you what I'm up to, because the the film playing what's called the dawn the Donald. And you want to know who one of the people is that stars in the movie,
Unknown Speaker 29:49
Alyssa Lynn. Oh, my God, that's awesome.
Speaker 1 29:57
I have a blurry picture of the world. Heard Alyssa Lynn.
Speaker 2 30:02
I just love it even more, because don't most porn stars pick their name. So, like, yeah, like, her chosen Alyssa. Oh,
Speaker 1 30:10
that's awesome. So I got very excited about Alyssa Lynn, so I did some research on her. Oh,
Unknown Speaker 30:17
quick question, did you?
Unknown Speaker 30:19
Did you like, look at
Speaker 2 30:21
it at all, like, did you watch like, the first 30 seconds, or anything? Just
Unknown Speaker 30:25
kind of see, no, I was not trying to be like,
Speaker 1 30:30
You're that guy. Jamie house has ruined you, and I need you to save that for me and send it over beaver hunt.com. If anyone's interested in watching the Donald but no, it was just like, you know, it's like two in the afternoon and it's just like
Unknown Speaker 30:49
looking at penises. Yeah, it was
Speaker 1 30:51
like, oh, close. Too much. Too much for 2pm but I did do a little research on Alyssa Lynn, so Google told me that she is a gorgeous MILF, and she started in the porn industry in 2017 when she was 33 so that's why she's because she's like old for porn. I guess I thought that like, and this might sound dumb, but I thought people kind of just got kicked out, kind of around their 30s. Yeah, that's kind of what I thought, too. But yeah, you can start in their 30s. You can start, I mean, I know there are people that, like grandmas and shit, so maybe it's not hard kicking out. Um, she was born on April 30, 1980 in Pennsylvania. If you want to look at her Instagram, it's Mrs. Underscore Alyssa, underscore Lynn, which makes me want to change mine to like Mrs. Alyssa Lynn, too,
Unknown Speaker 31:55
even though you're like the original,
Unknown Speaker 31:58
the birth human name.
Unknown Speaker 32:01
I looked at her IMDb,
Speaker 1 32:05
because the names, the titles, yes. So she has some hilarious titles under her belt, or lack thereof,
Unknown Speaker 32:17
under her towel, under her
Speaker 1 32:19
towel that she's thrown Oh, her bullet belt, yes, so I'm gonna read some for us so we have big tits at work. That was me today.
Unknown Speaker 32:36
I love my mom's big tits.
Unknown Speaker 32:39
Oh, no,
Speaker 1 32:44
I love my mom's big tits too. Why was the first one so popular? And then there was my mom's big tits, three? No,
Speaker 2 32:52
why is there so much demand for something like that? Then also, no, not. Four. I love my mom's big tits, four.
Unknown Speaker 33:05
There was tittyland Two.
Unknown Speaker 33:18
Mommy got boobs. I Oh, yeah,
Speaker 1 33:25
this is how I want people to describe me hot and mean, good one. We have lusty busty MILFs on the job.
Speaker 2 33:39
Weirdly super descriptive one it is
Unknown Speaker 33:42
that's me as well. Looking at this at work,
Unknown Speaker 33:46
we have MILP maniac five sounds
Unknown Speaker 33:49
like a murder.
Unknown Speaker 33:52
And then this is my
Unknown Speaker 33:54
favorite one. Oops. I
Unknown Speaker 33:58
cream pied my stepmom. Oh, God. Made
Unknown Speaker 34:05
my whole body cringe.
Speaker 1 34:09
I read that to G and he doubled over laughing, which is my reaction when I first read it, like I had to practice saying it so I didn't fuck it up by laughing.
Speaker 2 34:24
Oh yeah, no, it just made me cringe really bad. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 34:27
I think it just ruined Jamie's life.
Speaker 1 34:31
I also found Alyssa Lynn on their website I didn't know existed, called
Speaker 3 34:36
boobpedia. Oh,
Speaker 1 34:39
I'll show you a picture of their logo.
Unknown Speaker 34:42
I assume it's just like
Speaker 3 34:45
a wiki, Wikipedia, but boobs kind of like the feet, one
Unknown Speaker 34:51
fun little logo.
Speaker 2 34:52
That's a fun logo, but, I mean, I would have put the boobs, or the boobs, like on the O's of the boobs, as opposed to on top. Uh, but
Unknown Speaker 35:02
too obvious approach. So I like their approach, yeah,
Unknown Speaker 35:05
um,
Speaker 1 35:07
they say, I guess the reason she's on boobpedia
Speaker 3 35:12
is because she has really big boobs. Mommy got boobs. That's why stupid Mommy got boobs. I
Unknown Speaker 35:23
mean, there's a whole movie about
Unknown Speaker 35:27
it. They're referring
Unknown Speaker 35:29
to it as a film, cinematic
Unknown Speaker 35:31
master.
Speaker 1 35:35
So they say that her boobs started out with 700 cc's of saline, which is roughly a 30 4d so that's like already big, then she increased to 1200 cc's, so she made her boobs almost twice as big. Whoa. Can you imagine that sounds like a nightmare that?
Speaker 3 35:59
Yeah, that just sounds like a lot to just lug around all day.
Speaker 1 36:06
Alyssa Lynn, she's an actress, though
Unknown Speaker 36:09
she is.
Speaker 3 36:12
She's got experience with it, I guess, like I
Unknown Speaker 36:17
so every once in a while,
Speaker 2 36:18
like my boobs will catch on something. It's like, god damn it. But I'm sure with boobs like that, you get like, you have to work around them. So I'm sure she has a lot of experience navigating with it, I guess, dude, I'll
Speaker 1 36:34
show you, I'll show you a normal picture. I've hurt you enough.
Unknown Speaker 36:41
I do
Speaker 2 36:42
think it's hilarious that they just like track, like
Unknown Speaker 36:46
the growth of the boobs,
Unknown Speaker 36:49
or like the transformation.
Speaker 1 36:55
Let's see. Oh, well, now I can't find Alyssa Lynn's Instagram.
Speaker 2 36:59
Let me see if I can. Maybe she blocked you. She was like, Is this Alyssa Lynn, other Alyssa Lynn, looking, oh, wait, this
Speaker 1 37:07
is her. Okay, Ouch, my competition. Oh, look, she's Winnie the Pooh. Here
Unknown Speaker 37:14
she is, Winnie the Pooh.
Speaker 1 37:15
I can post that one on Instagram. It's safe. She's standing in front of Oh, and it's
Unknown Speaker 37:19
already on Instagram. So
Unknown Speaker 37:22
I bet the Pope would like that picture
Speaker 1 37:25
would and here's her looking like mysterious in the door.
Unknown Speaker 37:29
That lighting is awesome.
Speaker 1 37:34
So yeah, that's my coverage of men's entertainment.
Unknown Speaker 37:40
That was a really fun episode
Speaker 2 37:45
outside of journalism I've never seen before. Yeah,
Speaker 1 37:48
it's, it's a very interesting type of journalism.
Unknown Speaker 37:56
I don't
Speaker 1 37:58
know how these things are attractive, and I find women attractive, but when a man presents it in that way, it looks Yeah, it's not for me. Yeah,
Speaker 3 38:14
a woman, from a man's point of view, is not,
Unknown Speaker 38:20
not real life, yeah, I don't know.
Unknown Speaker 38:24
Yeah, so
Unknown Speaker 38:26
dudes are weird.
Speaker 2 38:30
Yeah, no, not all dudes are weird, but oh my god, some dudes want to see you bore at your underwear.
Speaker 1 38:39
No way if Jimmy Swaggart,
Unknown Speaker 38:45
Alyssa Lynn and Jimmy Swaggart, yeah, coming at you.
Speaker 3 38:50
Hopefully not live. That would be weird. I think they do. I think there are live things like that, though,
Unknown Speaker 38:58
probably beaver hunt.com,
Unknown Speaker 38:59
yeah. I man,
Speaker 1 39:02
I think that for our next like merch thing, we need to make handkerchiefs to put over your rib crotch, sweatpants for modesty, and we can
Unknown Speaker 39:13
double up as like the Euro club cover.
Unknown Speaker 39:17
Actually we should do the towel skirt.
Speaker 3 39:21
Euro club, three in one, yeah, yeah, it's a very specific three.
Unknown Speaker 39:29
I bet people will need it. We could just
Speaker 2 39:31
make a hand towel and just, you know, we'll just call it that, the three in one
Unknown Speaker 39:37
skirt cover.
Speaker 1 39:40
We could kind of make it like a little since our logo has a clown, like an optical illusion. So if you have the towel on your lap and then you get a boner, maybe, like, it could be like he's holding a balloon and, like, stretching it out. I don't know. How that technology would work, but we could figure it out. I'm
Speaker 2 40:03
sure. I feel like a lot of new technology is figured out through sex things. So, yeah, new technology.
Speaker 1 40:11
We'll bring it. We'll Bring it. Bring it so you can Winnie the Pooh around your house or in the car in a Louisiana bayou for your jar grande booze on
Speaker 3 40:26
your trip to see your mistress do the
Unknown Speaker 40:33
yeah the front butt Borat
Unknown Speaker 40:37
and be one mouthwash, one mouthwash cup
Speaker 2 40:40
away. Oh, god, Oh, I'm just thinking about him and just being like, so close to her vagina. Just, I don't know, it is funny that it looks like she's laughing in the picture where she's demonstrating how she did it.
Unknown Speaker 40:55
Yeah, that fucking weirdo, I don't know.
Unknown Speaker 40:59
Oh, but
Speaker 2 41:02
I think that wraps up this soul tree episode. It's getting a little steamy, steaming.
Speaker 1 41:07
I gotta put my Euro club hanky skirt back on.
Speaker 3 41:14
Nice. Yeah, sweat hole, sweat pant hole cover,
Unknown Speaker 41:20
manhole cover, yeah, yeah, just
Unknown Speaker 41:27
keep your manholes covered. Yeah,
Speaker 1 41:29
just have sex if you want. You don't have to, tend to do all this. Yeah, you don't have stuff. It's okay. Yeah, don't
Speaker 2 41:38
have to be embarrassed. Just make sure everyone's consenting, and that's good. Yes, someone
Unknown Speaker 41:42
will consent with you eventually, yes,
Speaker 1 41:44
Jamie consented to me showing her these horrendous pictures.
Speaker 2 41:51
And thank you for giving consent with your ears, yes, if you're still listening,
Speaker 1 41:58
like, yeah, it turned out after oops, which would be fair I
Speaker 2 42:06
turned out after big boobs four or whatever it
Unknown Speaker 42:12
was, big, bouncy, titty land. Mom
Unknown Speaker 42:15
four,
Speaker 1 42:17
yeah. Alyssa Lynn makes some questionable movies with her people that play her daughters. So
Unknown Speaker 42:26
this Alyssa Lynn, makes killer podcasts,
Speaker 2 42:33
and you guys are all of our fat head listeners.
Speaker 3 42:37
Thank you for Alyssa. Thank you. And yeah, cover up your manholes and party on
Unknown Speaker 42:43
party on